Foolish Request of the Day -- Grill

Our office complex has a communal grill that is chained to the fence.

Submitted Request: Can you please unchain the grill so I can borrow it for a family BBQ I am hosting this weekend? Also, can you make sure it has a full tank of propane?

Secretary's Solution: Don't host a BBQ if you don't own a grill. The office grill isn't going anywhere, hence the chain.

His Reply: Come on, it is only for the weekend. I don't want to have to go to your boss.

My Reply: Feel free (as I provided my boss' email)

Boss' Memo to the Whole Company: The office appliances, kitchen tools and grill are not for personal use. Taking them from the office is prohibited. Thank you.

Foolish Request of the Day -- Scanning

Submitted Request: I needed scanning capabilities. Please let me up so I can scan as soon as possible.

Secretary's Solution: It is a communal, open-to-anyone scanner/fax. You came in this morning with scanning capabilities, use them wisely.

Foolish Request of the Day -- Folders

Submitted Request: I need some new folders. I would like mauve colored folders. Not purple, not lilac, not violet... MAUVE.

Secretary's Solution: All out of mauve folders. I only have gamboge, malachite and razzmatazz.

Requesters Response: What colors are those?

Boss' Response after overhearing request: Green, yellow and pink . Those are your options. End of discussion.

You've Got to be Kidding Me - Test

We had a new employee start recently. My first interaction from him was the following email --

"This is a test. I've never used email before."

Just as I finished reading, he showed up at my desk to see if I got the email.

We hired him to be our communications manager. Oh dear!

Foolish Request of the Day -- Paper Towels

Submitted Request -- There are hundreds of paper towels in my work space and down the hall. Please clean up, it looks hideous.

Secretary's Solution -- Your coworkers think so highly of you that they pulled a prank on you. I have left you some trash bags and gloves. Cleanup is all you, buddy.

You've Got to be Kidding Me -- Password

Employee of 14 Years -- "I changed my password on Friday because it said it was about to expire. Over the weekend, I forgot the new password. Help."

Secretary -- "Do I look like the IT department?"

Foolish Request of the Day - ID Card

Sent in from Leslie --

Submitted Request: I don't like the photo on my company ID card. Can you please update it with the pic I have attached? Thanks.

Secretary's Solution: After reviewing the photo you attached I am going to have to decline your request. A picture of you taking body shots off some nearly nude male is not ID worthy. Please send a more appropriate picture. Photos you are tagged in from Spring Break are not ideal for corporate viewing.